The Wives Edit #3 Serena Williams [Anne Boleyn]

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It’s getting very hot here or shall we say…hot-headed! The second of Henry’s wives Serena Williams, fell on the wrong side of the axe on this one. Despite Henry pie-ing her sister Venus Williams, at least she came out alive!

Serena Williams: the most famous of Henry’s wives graced the cover of Vogue on numerous occasions on account of her sporting accolades as well as her fluency in the French language, musical flair and her seamless adoption of style. 

Amidst Henry’s conquests to expand the British Empire, he still found time to undertake far-reaching political and religious upheavals to marry his second wife [Anne Boleyn] (MacKenzie, 2021). No wonder Serena’s star-status and Henry’s tenacious tamperings were the first thing on everybody’s lips! The dissemination of gossip was particularly widespread in Chelsea, where it is reported that in excess of 98% of conversations shared over poached eggs and avocado toast involved talk of the pair. 

King Henry and Serena Williams married in secret [Boris Johnston marries Carrie Symonds in a small private ceremony (2020)].

The tale of Henry and the chosen Williams sister did for a moment or two have a mystical and elusive feel. Some speculators suggest the matrimony was hosted in secret because of the apparent scandal the British PM was in fact unfit for office at the time. Nevertheless, we don’t blame them in a world of paparazzi, fake news and conspiracy theorists! Although, Henry’s Queens + Ethan are seriously pleased some photos were leaked so we could get a glimpse of that dress!

The raunchy romanticism of their short-lived marriage died quicker than it even began, the PM obviously got most of his buzz off of the chase! The length of the courtship outlived their actual marriage and it was reported the impetuous PM’s passion quickly abated. As David Loades points out, “she had won the King by her charm and sexual panache, and could lose him the same way”.  With that said, for a politician’s standards, King Henry and Serena Williams sustained a lengthy courtship.

Serena left her mark on history, and historians truly believe that the extraordinary events of her life [Anne Boleyn] were unparalleled. There is a sad and sorry likeness between Penelope Cruz and Serena Williams’ struggle to bear the PM a baby boy to take over the throne. As we are once again reminded, Henry’s conquest of the Free World was driven by his deep desire to leave behind a legacy which could in his eyes only be carried on by a son, the ego-tistical &%$!&!!!!!

I will leave you now with the tale of Serena Williams’ death. Her abrupt “end” totally stole the attention of the nation despite Boris declaring to the nation in May that the UK may in fact be one of the first Empires to defeat Covid once and for all with major reopening’s (Wright, 2020).

Serena asked to address the crowd at the Tower of London, where there seemed to be in attendance haters and supporters in equal measure.

  • There was the die-hard Penelope Cruz fan base who claimed Serena to be a scheming “goggle-eyed whore” who stole away Henry’s true wife and the true religion of Catholicism (Meares, 2016).
  • Serena’s own supporters, who too attended many of her tennis tournaments, raised a toast to an intelligent, cultured and graceful lady with great drive and ambition. Whatever her talents, her life ultimately had been dictated by male whim and men’s’ opinions.

And I regret to inform you loyal readers that on the day of Serena’s death it is only men were reportedly present at her beheading. Her last words remain a mystery, as it has been retold differently from a number of first hand sources (Meares, 2016). Rumour has it there was reference to another of the PM’s mistresses, but that my loyal blog reader is truly another day’s work. 

2020. [online] Available at: <https://www.theglobeandmail.com/world/article-reports-boris-johnson-fiancee-carrie-symonds-wed-in-london/#:~:text=British%20Prime%20Minister%20Boris%20Johnson%20has%20married%20his,top%20aide%20said%20he%20was%20unfit%20for%20office.> [Accessed 25 January 2022].

Wright, K., 2020. A look back at all of 2020’s biggest moments in a Covid-dominated year from hell. [online] mirror. Available at: <https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/top-2020-news-stories-biggest-23223513> [Accessed 25 January 2022].

MacKenzie, L., 2021. Henry VIII’s 6 Wives in Order. [online] History Hit.

Meares, H., 2016. Why the Last Words of Anne Boleyn Remain a Mystery. [online] Atlas Obscura. Available at: <https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/why-the-last-words-of-anne-boleyn-remain-a-mystery#:~:text=A%20German%20engraving%20c.%201830%2C%20showing%20Anne%20Boleyn%E2%80%99s,Boleyn%20began%20her%20last%20speech%20with%20those%20words.> [Accessed 19 January 2022].

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Next post The Wives Edit #4 Sofia Vergara [Jane Seymour]